Love After Life

After posting my blog entry yesterday I had to go into town to get some new glasses. On the way into town I was going to turn the radio on to a news channel and Irene told me to turn on a music channel instead, so I did.  Boston's "More Than a Feeling" started playing immediately.  Instantly a whole visualization scene popped in my head.  She and I were dressed like Spaniards doing a formal dance in a big ballroom area.  I had on a black flat-top hat and we were posed to begin our dance.  What followed was just amazing - it was like a cross between a traditional Spanish dance and more western ballroom dancing, like we had choreographed it all out for the music.  At a couple of points I was telling Irene how I was reacting "over there" - meaning me, here in this physical world, driving my car down the road. To see her looking like that, full of life and energy, smiling and having such a good time, just filled my heart to overflowing with joy.  I was totally l

I woke up this morning feeling great.  Immediately my "walking visualization", imprinted over whatever I happen to be doing, was of Irene and I at some balcony of a very high building overlooking a part of a city near a bay, with fantastic buildings all around and a view of a harbor where these ships and boats were coming and going, some docked. We had glasses of orange juice and a pitcher of it on the table.  This was completely out of the blue, not something I normally visualize. We had a conversation that was mostly about "allowing", a term Abraham-Hicks uses a lot.  She reminded me that in all the time that we were together physically, all the things we wanted just came to pass naturally through really synchronistic chains of events.  None of them required my personal focus, meditation or efforts, other than doing some things I felt compelled to do and basically, 99% of the time, just not getting in the way or trying to force things into my pre-existent expect

After that big day and a half of constant visualization and mental communication with Irene, yesterday I felt some internal pushback. My physical body and physical-oriented psychology wasn't too happy about moving away from my comfortable physical-Earth centered system of visualizing her here and talking out loud. The strange thing is that it is even easier than visualizing her here with me and feels much better. You'd think that would prevent any such pushback (or mini-withdrawal) but, just like when she first crossed over, my physiology wasn't happy about the change. I didn't experience any grief or sorrow, it was just a weird kind of "no, I don't wanna do it" sensation in the back of my mind - like habit was actually given an emotion to express itself to me. As Abraham would say, a part of me was "resistant". So yesterday and this morning I've gone ahead and talked to her out loud on occasion just to ease myself more

As the sun was going down yesterday (which is pretty early - around 6:00), I had set the Hopper to pause before Wheel of Fortune came on and, is our daily routine, sat on the porch for a smoke and to talk with Irene.  As usual, I sit in a comfy lawn chair, my arm around the back of the chair next to me (where Irene sits) with my feet up on another chair in front of me as we look out at the view through the porch windows, chatting. I was telling her how much I love her - out loud, which is how I've been talking to her for the most part since she crossed over. I felt a twinge of sorrow, something I haven't felt in a long time.  I switched over to mental talking because, back when I was still recovering from the pain, I found I could easily say those things to her mentally without triggering those painful emotions. She drew my attention to this, so I repeated what I was saying out loud and the twinge of sorrow came up again, whereas I could say the same things to her mentall

Irene has really been giving me some good connection sensations the past few days.  I'll feel her, my breath will catch and my heart will race, I'll get a big goofy smile and my eyes get misty, sometimes several times a day.  My meditation has just been fantastic - long meditations where I talk to her, easily visualize her, and just go into a deep vibration of peace and happiness.  Lately she's been popping into my head in different dresses and outfits. Once while I was pouring coffee she appeared, in my mind, sitting on the counter dressed up in some kind of a New-Agey Native American outfit.  She always had a thing about Native Americans.  We have a whole room dedicated to that motif with puzzles we did up on the walls and various knick-nacks, statues and pictures.  Earlier when I was talking with her on the porch she appeared on my lap dressed like that and said, "You like this?" and I just burst out laughing.  She is always so playful and quick-witted.  I a

Wow, has a week really gone by? I think that's the longest I've gone without posting here. To tell you the truth, it often feels to me that my experiences are so "normal" now that it doesn't occur to me to write it down in the blog. My meditations lately have been fantastic. I immediately get tuned in and feel like I'm coming out of my body. The visualizations are really great as well. Lately I've been including Pico and Marley, our dogs, in the visualization because it came to my attention they were feeling left out. I never even considered the notion that my visualization could actually draw them into our experience. That's pretty mind blowing. It kind of broadens the scope of what can be accomplished via visualization. I'm co-hosting an automatic writing group for AREI zoom rooms. As part of that, I read up on what automatic writing was - I really had no idea. Come to find out, virtually everything I write about in terms of existential

This morning I was going to listen to our "theme song", something Irene directed me to a few months ago - "Forever and For Always", but when I clicked on it to play it skipped to another song. When it started I thought it was "Beat It", by Michael Jackson (they both start on the same long musical note), so I had my finger on the mouse to go back and play Forever and For Always. Irene stopped me and said "I'm playing this song for you, listen to it." So I let it play. This i s what she played: The emotion it sent through me was overwhelming. I was literally tingling/vibrating head to foot for several minutes after it played and after I calmed down. I was trying to figure out what that emotion was and couldn't think of a word for it, but I came up with this: "The emotion you feel when something you hope for and dream about is confirmed as true in your heart." Here are the lyrics: Treated me kind Sweet destiny

For quite a while now I've been trying to articulate an information download I got during one of my hypnagogic experiences some time ago.  From time to time I've written a little about it here in the blog and elsewhere, but for the most part I've just tried to ignore it. It was for the most part just troublesome and confusing and didn't really serve my interest as far as increasing my connection to Irene and setting up our "afterlife" connection. As time passed, though, I started seeing how this information, properly articulated, could actually help me in that goal.  After more processing of the ideas I expressed in my last post, and a whole slew of synchronistic events supporting the direction of the development of those ideas, plus some more information I've gleaned from whatever source while talking with Irene, I've put together a model of existence that basically turns most cosmological models inside-out.  Perhaps some others might find it useful

The other day when Irene and I were talking I realized I hadn't sent  her a card on the anniversary of the day we met - January 9th - and told her I was going to send her one and jokingly asked "Why don't you send me one, too?"   Immediately an emotional understanding came across me; the radiant flower she had been drawing in her coffee cup since the day after she crossed over was in fact her giving me a card that said "I love you and I'm with you always!" every single day.  Someone in one of the afterlife groups made the comment that what we were doing on Earth was raising our vibration to move our universe closer to the astral to make it more like the astral.  For whatever reason that stuck in my mind and I started wondering what that would look from our point of view.  As regular readers know, I don't think we actually change the world per se, but rather just move vibrationally from one version of Earth to others, so to speak.  Or, another way t

This is all, of course, from my personal experience and perception, so please don't take it as "spirit-'splaining" - feel free to dismiss if it doesn't resonate with you. Just now, I was out on the porch talking with Irene, and whenever I focused my loving attention on her I got an immediate physiological reaction.  My heart races, tears come to my eyes, and I feel things that are difficult to sort out. This is not something new, but it has become easier and easier to the point that it is basically something I can just do at any time. The feeling itself is great, but it's like my brain is learning to process something it doesn't recognize and cannot coordinate with the physical situation.  We talked a bit about it and I focused attention on her a couple of more times to try and figure out what it was, exactly, that I was feeling. Like I said, this isn't a new sensation. I've reported on it about as long as I've been writing this blog. The

My relationship with Irene has reached a state of such normalcy and connection that I'm not even experiencing "forlorn longing" or sadness with regards to her not being here physically any more.  Every day now I'm very comfortable in my knowledge that she is here with me, that I am talking with her, and what is in store for us going forward.  Just like when she was here physically, I can get to where I need to be with her in more direct contact, and I meditate to get more deeply in tune with our shared consciousness frequency, but that was the norm for both of us here. I can get that with only a few minutes of visualization meditation. There are times when I want a more direct contact from her and I feel her presence more vividly, which causes my heart to race and tears of love and joy come to my eyes.  It is an exquisite, intimate sensation. I can just tell her I need to get a "dose" and she provides it.  When we were together we could just tell each othe

I just thought I'd make a post about the basic afterlife information I've accumulated. Most people when they cross over find themselves in a world much like ours. It feels every bit as physical, except is is much more responsive to thought. People that OOBE and NDE, and information via credible mediums say  it is a hyper-real physical experience - it feels even more real than this world. Unless we desire to appear otherwise, most find themselves at the peak of physical health and youth. We are the same people there as here - same desires, same personality, same sense of humor, etc., and some have to undergo a healing and/or therapy time to deal with the mental effects/trauma/disorders that we can carry over with us. Others who have deeply entrenched beliefs often find themselves experiencing the manifestation of those beliefs because of the afterlife responsiveness to mind. We are capable of doing all the things there, physically, that we do here. From what I've read and ex

I was sitting on the porch talking with Irene, and I was thinking about how often I had wish I had already crossed over or lamented the fact that I was still here - not that my life here isn't a good one, it is. I often semi-joke with my spirit team, "I finished the will! Ready to go, any time now!" A realization came over me, though, that Irene and I are on such an exquisite journey right now. Hard, painful, at times sorrowful, made more difficult by fear and doubt - yet, I know how this journey turns out. I know what is waiting for me, and I know it will be all the sweeter, all the more joyous, all the more triumphant because of the difficulty of the path. Sure, I could have died with her - that would have been much easier. And finding ourselves together in the astral at the same time would have been great, but I know for certain it wouldn't have been anything like the experience I see ahead for us - a magnificent, glorious reunion that can only be had through a pai