Love After Life

I've been trying to write this post since yesterday morning. Maybe this time I'll be able to do it justice. First off, I've never been a "love and light" or an "it's all about love" kind of guy. Love is great, don't get me wrong. I've been madly in love with Irene pretty much from the day we met. I've felt my love for her, but never felt her love for me until she crossed over. I mean, I knew she loved me madly - she told me often and demonstrated it and I would often feel lit up inside because of it, but it felt like my emotion, not hers. I think that in this world, this inability to actually feel the love other people have for us is the root of most of our insecurities, doubts and fears when it comes to these kinds of romantic, partnering relationships. You never know what the other person is actually thinking or feeling. Sure, you trust them, but there's still this gap simply because we don't really see or feel what...

I've had a couple more of those strong connection sensations today.  It is so sweet and transcendent - an emotion or sensation there is no word for.  I remember getting this sensation before and it was very confusing because it caused some sorrow at the same time, I remember writing here that I felt it was because it was Irene and her presence generated the sorrow of missing her. Now, this sensory, vibrational quality of her presence "touching" me, or going through me, isn't bringing up any sadness, just this very unique and comforting feeling that affects me throughout. I posted the rough draft of the book on the blog today so that people who come here looking for relief from their grief will at least be able to read how it happened for me. As I read back through the book, and in doing so referred back to some prior posts, I find so utterly unbelievable that I can really, actually feel this way.  It's like our relationship never stopped being this good - as...