This IS One Of Our Afterlife Amnesia Experiences
The past few days Irene has been changing up her coffee-drawing routine - some days she draws in it some days there's absolutely nothing - just a cup with uniform brown color without even a pale swirl. The way I make her coffee has been absolutely the same each day, and the environmental factors have been the same. The milk has come out of the same container. She's not been just getting my attention and reinforcing the fact that it is her that makes the drawings; noticing this has also helped move my thoughts and attention in a certain direction.
Yesterday I came up with a new form of our memory-suppression game, where she wakes up in the afterlife with the memory awareness of having just crossed over from her illness, waking up in our bed in the astral to find me there with her. This led me to think more about the whole memory-suppression concept, and I found a new way of visualizing the idea, but more importantly it made me realize that all individual consciousness is, in fact, a memory suppression experience. I realized a more accurate term would be that we are always having an awareness suppression experience (or a limited-awareness experience).
At any given time we have a certain breadth and depth of awareness, and this awareness comes in different categories. There is what we are immediately, consciously aware of, including our physical senses, sense of self, our immediate surroundings, and our concept of who, what and where we are. Slightly extended from that are our recent surface memories and knowledge, which we we don't usually keep in our ongoing conscious experience, but which are easily accessed. Much of our knowledge (like how to open my blog and type) is very easily called forth and is a lot like muscle memory - things we can do automatically without even having to bring that knowledge and memory to the conscious level.
There is also deeper memory and knowledge, much of which we cannot even bring to our conscious mind without great effort. Some of that knowledge (a lot of which is more accurately described as "belief") drives much of our interpretive and reactive habits. In my opinion, at the core of all of this is a spark of the divine, our pure consciousness, which is god, or infinite source. It is suppressed (for most of us) and interpreted through all the other layers of conscious, subconscious and unconscious awareness.
In other words, at our root we are God or infinite Source. Everything else is a form of awareness suppression - our entire individuality and experience is based on suppressing awareness of our infinite nature and our infinite knowledge. This led me to start visualizing my awareness as a kind of sphere with a divine spark at the center, and my immediate conscious awareness as my surface, with various layers of suppression between my conscious awareness and my divine core, which we call the subconscious and the unconscious.
This morning I had a rather unique experience; an epiphany that, instead of instilling a sense of awe and excitement as they usually do, brought me to tears.
One of my favorite modes of thought is to begin with the premise that what I am experiencing now is not, in any way, fundamentally different from any other experience I have in eternity. I dislike any "special pleading" for this particular experience. The idea that Irene and I are on our "last life" has always bothered me to some degree, because it makes this particular experience special. In the framework of eternity, it means that I just happen to find myself (my current conscious awareness) in a spectacularly special situation. That doesn't seem right. With an eternal past, how is it that Irene and I are going through this situation just now? That doesn't make any sense at all.
That's the problem with an eternal framework; telos philosophy (teleological progressions and goals) doesn't make any sense in an eternal framework. It only makes sense in a time-limited perspective. We all would have already had an eternity to attain so-called "enlightenment," if that was indeed our ultimate goal. If we haven't done so by now, it was never our "ultimate" goal, in terms of eternity, to do so. Furthermore, there can't be any meaningful goals with respect to eternity; goals can only exist in a non-eternal framework, which is why teleology can only exist within a framework of suppressed awareness and limited time - but that's a philosophical discussion for another day.
My awareness of all the "amnesia experiences" that I've found the past several weeks for our eternal romantic relationship, and my view of "dream experiences" and transdimensional, staged experiences helped me reach the epiphany that what I'm experiencing right now is just another deliberate suppression experience Irene and I are staging in the astral (and ultimately from beyond the astral) for the sake of enjoying our relationship. It's all suppression experiences nested within suppression experiences - that is what our eternal relationship is; a multi-level suppressed awareness experience with continuous variations that we set up for ourselves and then suppress that knowledge in order to have the kinds of experiences of each other we want.
So, what I have been planning on doing "in the afterlife" with Irene "after I die" is in fact what is actually going on right now. This IS one of our "afterlife amnesia/awareness-suppression experiences." That's what this must be in terms of an eternal framework.
Yesterday I came up with a new form of our memory-suppression game, where she wakes up in the afterlife with the memory awareness of having just crossed over from her illness, waking up in our bed in the astral to find me there with her. This led me to think more about the whole memory-suppression concept, and I found a new way of visualizing the idea, but more importantly it made me realize that all individual consciousness is, in fact, a memory suppression experience. I realized a more accurate term would be that we are always having an awareness suppression experience (or a limited-awareness experience).
At any given time we have a certain breadth and depth of awareness, and this awareness comes in different categories. There is what we are immediately, consciously aware of, including our physical senses, sense of self, our immediate surroundings, and our concept of who, what and where we are. Slightly extended from that are our recent surface memories and knowledge, which we we don't usually keep in our ongoing conscious experience, but which are easily accessed. Much of our knowledge (like how to open my blog and type) is very easily called forth and is a lot like muscle memory - things we can do automatically without even having to bring that knowledge and memory to the conscious level.
There is also deeper memory and knowledge, much of which we cannot even bring to our conscious mind without great effort. Some of that knowledge (a lot of which is more accurately described as "belief") drives much of our interpretive and reactive habits. In my opinion, at the core of all of this is a spark of the divine, our pure consciousness, which is god, or infinite source. It is suppressed (for most of us) and interpreted through all the other layers of conscious, subconscious and unconscious awareness.
In other words, at our root we are God or infinite Source. Everything else is a form of awareness suppression - our entire individuality and experience is based on suppressing awareness of our infinite nature and our infinite knowledge. This led me to start visualizing my awareness as a kind of sphere with a divine spark at the center, and my immediate conscious awareness as my surface, with various layers of suppression between my conscious awareness and my divine core, which we call the subconscious and the unconscious.
This morning I had a rather unique experience; an epiphany that, instead of instilling a sense of awe and excitement as they usually do, brought me to tears.
One of my favorite modes of thought is to begin with the premise that what I am experiencing now is not, in any way, fundamentally different from any other experience I have in eternity. I dislike any "special pleading" for this particular experience. The idea that Irene and I are on our "last life" has always bothered me to some degree, because it makes this particular experience special. In the framework of eternity, it means that I just happen to find myself (my current conscious awareness) in a spectacularly special situation. That doesn't seem right. With an eternal past, how is it that Irene and I are going through this situation just now? That doesn't make any sense at all.
That's the problem with an eternal framework; telos philosophy (teleological progressions and goals) doesn't make any sense in an eternal framework. It only makes sense in a time-limited perspective. We all would have already had an eternity to attain so-called "enlightenment," if that was indeed our ultimate goal. If we haven't done so by now, it was never our "ultimate" goal, in terms of eternity, to do so. Furthermore, there can't be any meaningful goals with respect to eternity; goals can only exist in a non-eternal framework, which is why teleology can only exist within a framework of suppressed awareness and limited time - but that's a philosophical discussion for another day.
My awareness of all the "amnesia experiences" that I've found the past several weeks for our eternal romantic relationship, and my view of "dream experiences" and transdimensional, staged experiences helped me reach the epiphany that what I'm experiencing right now is just another deliberate suppression experience Irene and I are staging in the astral (and ultimately from beyond the astral) for the sake of enjoying our relationship. It's all suppression experiences nested within suppression experiences - that is what our eternal relationship is; a multi-level suppressed awareness experience with continuous variations that we set up for ourselves and then suppress that knowledge in order to have the kinds of experiences of each other we want.
So, what I have been planning on doing "in the afterlife" with Irene "after I die" is in fact what is actually going on right now. This IS one of our "afterlife amnesia/awareness-suppression experiences." That's what this must be in terms of an eternal framework.
Comments
Post a Comment