Love After Life

Felt normal to good all day with only a couple of minor, 15 second bouts of sadness.  I had 3 sessions today.  This is becoming a standard pattern for me.  One early in the morning, one around noon, and another around 6pm. From all the information I have gathered by reading websites about the afterlife and watching videos and combining that with what I knew already, I decided that some of my session intention needed to be tweaked; I no longer intend to “raise” my vibration level, but rather to put my physical body and thoughts on “sleep” or “stand-by” mode while I focus on activating my spiritual senses.   I think this concept is much more accurate to what I’m actually trying to do.  I'm always looking to make my intentions and prayers more direct, accurate and simple.

I woke up feeling pretty good.  Working on accepting the “normal” feeling, and being more accepting of my mental projections of Irene, even though it’s not of the same quality as my other experiences which seem to be much more real.  I’m trying to understand some of these emotions I experience as love for Irene and not pain, and that “missing her” sensation is an expression of my love for her and not something I want to avoid, but embrace and experience in a positive way.  I have to pray daily, sometimes several times a day, for strength, grace, comfort and understanding.  I had a really good session before Wheel of Fortune (which I always watch with her) where I was able to create a framework of understanding about our relationship. There is the daily, “normal” interaction where I don’t usually have as pronounced a sense of connection, but I still talk to her as if she’s with me and envision her at times with me.  This needs to be an entirely “no pressure”...

There are things I need to do to better prepare and condition myself for "lucid living" and developing a better connection to the spiritual in my quest to manifest a "transdimensional" relationship with Irene.  This is why spiritual doctrines use mantras, diet, physical meditating poses and breathing exercises – to find and develop our connection and relationship with the spiritual world, and to habitualize that process into a lifestyle pattern.  I think a lot of it boils down to intention and manifestation; the exercises/habits promote the intention, which in turn helps manifest results into reality. I think a lot of it is also just the grace of God.  I've started to look for more information, videos, books, etc. on the afterlife, prayer, meditation, the spiritual aspects of existence - which is saying a lot, since I've always been interested in such things and have always found such information fascinating and have tried to apply it to my life.  Howev...