Love After Life

Here's my two cents worth on the subject of whether or not something is a sign from our loved ones. If you experience something that makes you think it might be a sign from a loved one letting you know they are with you and love you, instead of letting fear (of being wrong) and doubt trouble you, simply make a decision one way or another, but do so in a way that makes either decision help you out in your desire for better contact and communication with the other side. Anything anyone experiences with regard to afterlife communication and contact could have other explanations, even if highly implausible. Afterlife entities usually work through some sort of physical medium in this world - sounds that already exist, animals, light, etc. and arrange or manipulate those things to make contact.  Often it is nothing more than what could be a very unlikely coincidence or string of coincidences. The point here is that most of us are not scientists or attempting to scientifically and obj...

Well okay, after pain and sorrow kicked my ass all last evening and today, I’ve come to the tentative realization that I’m just going to have to endure it at times. It's just physical withdrawal.  I’ll have some good times, some bad times, and just as the bad times have lessened their degree over the past couple of months, they’ll hopefully continue to lessen, and over time I’ll be able to have more and more normal and good times and increase my connection to Irene and be able to think of her and remember her with less pain and sorrow attached. The thing is, though, now I know I will survive the bad times and I know they will in fact go away and I will in fact experience joy and happiness again. Felt pretty good for a while this evening, had a good session, started realizing how blessed I am and how much I have to be grateful for.  I know my soulmate and spent 27 years with her in an amazing, loving relationship; I know where she is; I know she still exists and is always ...

Had a good session in the morning.  Later after Gerra and Jace left, started feeling like I was sinking (it is a bit of a pattern) so I meditated a while and stopped it.  The rest of the day was normal to manageable. Towards the evening I was thinking about how much of a commitment I was going to make towards meditating and what my actual goal was – to actually reach Irene, or to make my existence here enjoyable and functional while I am here - meaning that while I might not actually be able to leave my body and join her in spirit/astral and interact with her there, I could at least keep our connection high, allowing me to get through the rest of this life as happily as possible. I fell asleep thinking about this.

OMG I just had the most amazing experience!!!  I woke up feeling very good, did my morning prayer/talk with Irene/meditation and  during the meditation all of a sudden I was in this sunny, beautiful field with Irene and she was so beautiful, smiling so big, arms spread wide, I was just overwhelmed with that primordial sense of connection, love and happiness – tears were streaming down, just thinking of it now fills me with wholeness and happiness. It was only a few seconds but it was so clear and powerful.  I continued my meditation for a few minutes and then I felt Irene radiate from inside me with love and connection and happiness and joy so powerful I thought I would explode. I’ve never felt anything like it in my life. It was like an explosion of intimacy, wholeness and joy.  So amazing there are no words!!! 2 nd pray/talk/meditate session today, real good session, nothing spectacular at the time but I felt I got some good work done in raising my vibrationa...

Had a great day today – started off okay, then actually got better and better until I was having again having the sensation of being whole, that total connection to Irene, that comfort and grace, joy and happiness, talking to her and her being with me everywhere. After a couple of days of "normal", it's great to have a day like this.  I'm not sure how much "normal" I can take at this time, but it seems we are expanding my capacity.  I did the Pray/Talk/Meditation sequence I wrote about yesterday three times today, once in the morning right after I got up, once in the afternoon after I got back from the groomer, and once in the late evening.  Lots of stuff happened today – I got Pico and Marley groomed, and the groomers were the greatest.  I was able to talk about Irene there with happiness and joy.  We felt so good together, Irene and I, about how great the boys (our dogs) did and how good they look now.  I felt that Irene was really happy about findng...

I felt strong and good when I woke up, spent time with Irene working with Irene on new relationship, talking about what it means going forward.  I want our relationship to be strong and “normalized”, but I also recognize that I am insecure about that normalization.   One of the things I enjoyed about Irene being sick (ugh, I hate admitting this) was that she depended on me and I was able to come through for her.  Her illness provided a framework to let me show her how much I loved her and how much she could depend on me.  It was a similar thing with my mom when I was able to fully move my work to home; I could take care of her.  I could "pay her back" for all the help she had ever given us and I could "prove" to her that was worth that trust.  I found taking care of Mom and Irene very rewarding, like I might actually be a good person worth the love and trust others placed in me. So, it's been years since we had a "normal" relationship, so to s...

So I found a routine and some thoughts that seems to work in helping maintain my sense of close contact with Irene.  Several times a day I sit in my usual spot in the couch, get completely comfortable, turn off the lights and TV, close my eyes and begin by breathing in and out deeply 10 times.  If  I feel the need to pray I pray.  Then I begin imagining/seeing Irene next to me on the couch – leaning up right next to me, or sitting cross-legged, or curled up in my arms with her legs up on the couch.  I imagine/hear her talking to me.  From there I can imagine/see us in any other situation, which I feel is like us interacting at a higher level in a different plane of existence – the mental or astral plane, and so are not limited by physical circumstances or conditions.  I can talk to her using my voice or my mind, whichever feels more comfortable. I don’t try to force anything and I try to keep from feeling pressured to do anything (from my own ego)....