Mind-Blowing Encounters

It's just so unbelievable, when you think about it, how far Irene and I have come in so short a time.  Not even a year has passed since she crossed over, and our connection is so good and our visualizations together are so immensely satisfying, our communication so easy, it's like I'm living in a dream world that keeps getting better and better.  The feeling is like living in a constant state of varying degrees of euphoria. She can shoot me a look, a playful smile, a sarcastic comment and it will just go all through me like someone shot me up with heroin (well, what I imagine that must feel like - I've never tried it).

To think of how I felt not that long ago - the dark despair, the searing pain, the sense of hopelessness - and to compare it with what we have now, I can't say enough just how remarkable it is.  I don't say that in the sense of "Look what I've accomplished!", but rather in the sense of "Holy crap! Who would have ever thought this was even possible?" Irene and I were always able to manifest our desires, but this is just amazing and I'm sure we had plenty of help.  It's almost embarrassing, considering how difficult I know this process is for so many people struggling with their grief.

Last night, after my post yesterday, Irene and I had another mind blowing encounter - I really felt like my head was going to explode.  It seems to me that this not only started when I began mentally talking to her in visualizations rather than visualizing us physically talking, but also once I realized that our eternity together has already started.  Meaning, it doesn't begin when I die; it is already going on now.  Organizing my thoughts and expectations around my death was an unnecessary intermediary step - another resistance.

Additionally, I got that information translated that gave me a clear, comprehensible model of what is going on and that seems to have pushed aside several resistances I didn't even recognize as such - for example, small worries about hogging all her time and energy.  It seemed kind of selfish to think we could be together as much as I wanted, any time I wanted.  Small worries about almost always visualizing us in the same place, curled up together, if she found that boring or repetitive considering how much energy she has now. 

She referenced the information/Identity model and brushed all my unrecognized concerns aside, and it seemed to make a big difference, totally freeing up our capacity to interact. It was all really just my own mind placing barriers of small doubts, fears and insecurities between us.