Summer Blues

Today was a decent day.  Got to badly missing Irene a couple of times, but I'm sure that will continue as long as it takes to see her again.  I don't mind it, I embrace it.  Nothing wrong with missing the woman you love.  I tell her not to worry, that it's just the way it would be regardless of the situation if I didn't get to see her or hear her voice for months.  Most of the time, though, I talk to her and the others just as normally as I would talk to anyone here, only there's no responses you can hear.

It would probably seem pretty crazy to most people, but actually I think it's what has made the situation as good and livable as it is.  I would really like to have some more experiences, though. I guess I'm the impatient one now.  Throughout our time together here she was always the impatient one, wondering why what we intended and affirmed didn't happen sooner or faster.  Now I feel her advising me that we will be back together soon enough, that I just need to be patient. She must be getting a kick out of that!

The time of year is wearing on me and I need to cut myself some slack.  I never do well during the peak of summer - I'm a more of a cool and cold-weather kind of guy.  Not that anyone in their right mind likes day after day of 100 degree heat. It's been difficult for me to think straight all day, but I did get some really good meditation/intention/affirmation in as well as my prayers.  Days like today make it hard to stay on track because all I really want to be is distracted from the heat and my own impatience and emotions.