Love After Life

Yesterday, as part of a larger discussion going on between OOBErs Cyrus Kirkptrick, Jurgen Zeiwe and medium Susanne Wilson, I asked Jurgen about his take on how people experienced different dimensions while even seemingly in the same location. After I asked the question (in the AREI FB group), I went and spent some transdimensional time with Irene. Lately the hypnagogic experiences begin almost immediately, but I have a greater awareness in them and recall of them. Irene and I talk about them while they are occurring. A couple have included her and moments of astral sight and sound. The scenario that played out was Irene and I having fun on the beach on our tropical island, at one point jumping about 40 feet out into the ocean water (like super-jumping), seeing who could out-jump each other. She had such a smile, so happy, and laughing so much - so excited to be together, it just went all through me. The emotional reaction was just like being there. I got up and came in an...

After my post yesterday, Jurgen Ziewe wrote a post about his most recent out of body experience where he was shown what we might call an artist community in the afterlife.  One of the things he wrote about was entering a room where people were smoking and drinking, and for whatever reason I found that to be a huge validation of the vision I had of Irene and I when I was doing my intention meditation.  I mean, it made me ecstatically happy and it brings me great joy to think about it.  I don't know why, but it really comforts me to know that Irene can still smoke over there if she wants to.  She thoroughly enjoyed smoking here. I had a very nice chat with a man named Bill (oddly enough) in the Zoom Room - we just ran into each other there because I like to stay logged in to help people with the interface and to bring them up to speed on what groups are like. Turns out he has a neighbor named William and at first he thought I was him before he could see the video. The ...

I had another exhausting day yesterday with family - good, but exhausting.  I get hit with way too many frequencies and basically end up needing to isolate myself, but at least now it's back to the usual impact and I don't have to constantly worry about crashing or having emotional "attacks" during such events. Today has been very interesting.  I lay down a couple of times for astral projection attempts while falling asleep and began trying to focus on the semi-dream imagery that would begin to play out as I was drifting off.  It was hard to remember what was going on in those scenarios when I would pull myself awake.  The second time I lay down to do this there were a couple of things that stood out - one was when someone in my field of view said "Let me give you this" and walked over to  hand me something. It looked like a small square piece of plastic in their palm.  Another time someone asked very clearly "Why do we doubt?"  Putting it in ...

Yesterday I watched a few minutes of a movie that reminded me of that documentary about kids in Indonesia who dig snakes out of holes all day to sell for enough money for food for their families.  Talk about putting me in an attitude of gratitude and appreciation!  When I think I could have been dealing with the passing of my wife and having to do something like that all day long just to survive and no air conditioning or central heat and not have enough food and not have instant access to books and videos, etc. ... it kind of makes any self-pity or sorrow on my part seem laughably self-indulgent. So, boy, yeah, I had a big prayer of gratitude this morning. Also yesterday I was thinking I needed to find something else to read to keep using that method of tuning in to the frequency state I want. This morning in the Afterlife group, I found that Cyrus had posted a list of books to read on the subject, and others had contributed quite a few books. Someone suggested on...

Another great day yesterday, another great morning this morning!  I sat on the back patio this morning and said my prayers, smoked my morning cigarette and talked with irene.  A few short weeks ago I would have thought this kind of easy, normal feeling would either not be possible or would be somehow hurtful or disappointing, but I see that was only my own fear and insecurity.  Irene and I had a very fun, easy relationship while she was here - no drama, no need to make big issues out of anything. Well, that's where we had been for the last ten or twelve years. Before that there was the usual stuff most couple go through, especially when pre-existing children were involved. There's no reason this new form of our relationship cannot be as fun, easy and fulfilling, without me cooking it up with drama or tears or insecurities.  There is a very special, very warm and intimate quality to being able to speak to each other mentally that is an intensification of the connect...

Another good day.  I had to run into town to do some errands and had a nice talk with Irene about our lives on the other side. I'm thinking more in terms of what I imagine life would be like considering some of the circumstances I believe to be true about the astral worlds. I was also thinking (and talking with my spirit team) about the idea of "spiritual advancement" and how that idea doesn't resonate with me in the least. When I was younger and felt discontent most of the time, I looked to spiritual "enlightenment" or advancement as a means of quenching that discontent.  As I've mentioned, I used to meditate quite a bit and was doing so when Irene and I met.  I was also a vegetarian, complete non-drinker and non-smoker and used no recreational drugs whatsoever. However, it was actually being with Irene that gave me what I had always been looking for - complete satisfaction and fulfillment.  We talked about this often, how utterly satisfied and comp...

Yesterday, I was looking at a picture of myself and Irene in a small frame on a dresser in the bedroom.  The top of my head was cut off to fit the picture in the frame but I really liked it because she has such a sweet smile in the picture.  I found myself wishing I had that picture but without it being so tightly cropped. When I came into the office I felt a longing to look through some of our pictures that I have collected of the family that I haven't yet scanned in - there's quite a pile. I reached in to a bunch that were face down, picked them up and turned them over.  There was the exact same picture at the top of 10 or 12 pictures I had picked up, except it wasn't tightly cropped - it was the full picture. That was amazing considering we have virtually no duplicates of any pictures and that was a stack of about 70 pictures.  When Irene cropped a picture to put in a small frame, it was usually the only copy we had of that picture. It wasn't until the past coup...

One of the things about posting to this blog live is that I'm going to be posting a lot of stuff that occurs to me as it happens, instead of waiting until a later even brings it into focus and then writing about what happened before. I was just in the kitchen cooking some food and having a conversation with my spirit team about how hard it is, in a physical life, to really incorporate the spiritual and make it an integral part of our lives when most of our experience of the spiritual cannot even remotely compete with the ongoing, relentless onslaught of physical experience and concerns.  It's incredibly easy to get distracted by the physical and to get so caught up in it that you might go years without giving the spiritual anything more than a cursory thought. The effort towards integrating spirit into our lives is difficult. I have it better than most simply because I live alone and work from home so I can set my own schedule and talk freely to the other side all day long....

I had to drive into town again this morning. I really dislike having my routine interrupted but we (Irene and I) had a fun trip in and back. Later I was reading in the Facebook Grief Support Group about “moving on” and “finding a friend with benefits” or another life-partner. I thought it would be funny to reply something like “Well, Irene would haunt and harass the heck out of anyone that tried to get their hands on her man, so that wouldn’t be a good idea for me.” I didn’t, but it reminded me that Irene always said she was possessive , not jealous – you can only be jealous of what you don’t already have, and she already had me. I joked with her that you’re not supposed to be possessive in heaven and immediately thought about her saying “You just try it.” We both had a big laugh. That started this whole conversation I was going on with Irene about how ridiculous that would be – how miserable anything like another relationship would make me, how I’m extremely happy to be alone ...

Had a good session in the morning.  Later after Gerra and Jace left, started feeling like I was sinking (it is a bit of a pattern) so I meditated a while and stopped it.  The rest of the day was normal to manageable. Towards the evening I was thinking about how much of a commitment I was going to make towards meditating and what my actual goal was – to actually reach Irene, or to make my existence here enjoyable and functional while I am here - meaning that while I might not actually be able to leave my body and join her in spirit/astral and interact with her there, I could at least keep our connection high, allowing me to get through the rest of this life as happily as possible. I fell asleep thinking about this.