Love After Life

Am I doing enough? Too much? Am I doing it the right way? Trying too hard? Not hard enough? Am I bothering Irene? Am I too needy? Are my negative thoughts and emotions setting us back? Are they keeping us from going forward? Does she have other things to do? Am I boring her by saying the same thing over and over? Should I meditate more? Wake myself up in the middle of the night? Is that really her when I imagine her? When I feel her? What food, drink, medications or habits should I give up or take up to help? Should I try automatic writing, EVPs? How much effort should I put in them? Does Irene really want to do those things? Should I find a medium? At one point or another, every conceivable doubt and issue has crossed my mind with regards to my transdimensional relationship with Irene. Some were very fleeting, some were more difficult to process. IMO (in my opinion), none of what those doubts and fears refer to had as much impact on our transdimensional relationship than the wo...

Yesterday morning I had such a great dream of being with Irene!  We were walking through town, going home, talking and joking with each other. She wasn't visible, but we were talking and I knew she was with me as if she was physically there.  When we walked through the door of our home she was there physically.  There were other people in the room but I didn't see them. I sat down on a bar stool near the kitchen counter and she walked in front of me, face to face, I could see her very clearly.  She was so happy to be back together with me - I could just feel it emanating from her. We kissed several times. It was fantastic! I woke up and was extremely happy and excited that we had such a great dream together. Later in the day, the light fixture in my laundry room, which hasn't worked in a couple of months, suddenly came back on - which was weird, because I had turned the wall switch off when replacing the light bulb didn't fix it. I figured something had shorted out...

Yesterday, in a great mood after a nice nap, I felt like meditating.  As soon as I started I felt totally buzzed and high, yet this meditation was subtly different than most.  I was at a place, a sensation of feeling free somehow, like I was no longer sitting cross-legged on my couch.  It felt like I was in a vibrational pattern, my body and mind tuned in to it, and I was exploring that vibration.  There were nuances of experience in that vibrational range that I could explore in the sense of feeling slight changes in my perception of it and of myself in it.   I felt absolutely no desire or need to stop meditating, which usually occurs at the 10-20 minute mark. I was thoroughly enjoying this, but more, it felt like I was actually doing something really interesting - like it was a place I could explore, investigating all the nuances of that frequency range and how they affected me.  A couple of times I saw things clearly appear for a second, accompan...

Today the atmospherics completely changed, including a thirty-degree drop in the temperature.  Everything felt different. After prayer and an EVP recording this morning, I sat for meditation and Irene asked me where I'd like to have interaction with her, now that I know they are are completely real locations.  We settled on the big padded bench swing that sits overlooking the ocean and the horizon at the top of the path that leads down to the beach from our astral home. As we settled into our "spoon" position looking out at the view, she turned around facing me and said, "You do understand this is real, right?  You are actually here right now, even though it doesn't feel like that to you yet."  "I'm actually here, right now, with you." I repeated in agreement.  I could see her in my mind very clearly, feel her. It was still an envisioning, but suddenly this enormous swell of emotion just climbed from my heart up to my head bringing a...

Something I have found that I have to keep in mind is not to assign too much significance to simply feeling bad or sad.  Today hasn't been a great day.  I'm working on getting the title transfer for the truck and felt sad for a while a few times.  The air is thick and hot and I was up late watching the game with one of my sons.  Meditation has been great and I've stuck to my routine, but I just don't feel as good as I have been. That's normal life, however.  Sometimes you don't feel good.  We all have things we can feel sad about from time to time.  Not everything needs to be put into context of what "the problem" may be with my efforts to increase communication with Irene.  There's no reason to assume there is any problem. Some sadness about our situation is completely normal and reflective of my longing to be with her in the Astral; again, it's what one would expect even under normal circumstances of being apart from your loved one. Somet...

The subtitle on this blog reads [used to read, now I've changed it - WJM] : "My attempt to develop a fulfilling relationship with my soul-mate after she passed from the physical."  Amazingly, I now have a fulfilling relationship with Irene even though she has crossed over. That relationship is as good now, if not even better, than it was before.  I say "even better" because we have seen it not only survive but grow stronger because of this challenge.  Sometime during the day yesterday I realized that I have actually accomplished what I originally set out to do, but I have already expanded the scope of what I wish to achieve if possible. Originally, I was only keeping track of all the signs and messages that Irene was sending.  When I realized the only way I would be able to survive her passing was if I could keep our relationship and contact alive, I turned that into a journal, mainly to remind myself during dark times that there were times when I did feel who...

No confirmation so far on the stuff I was talking about the other day, but I guess I didn't need it. Or maybe I was just supposed  to make my own decision on it.  I guess I had really already made my decision about it and just wanted support in making it. Anyway, the guy in the video from the other day was talking about how he opened up his ability to speak to the dead.  He was a highly skeptical person and didn't believe that talking to the dead or even spirit guides was possible, so he just pretended to be talking to them in his mind.  If you've ever had a pretend conversation with someone in your mind, you know what I'm talking about.  I would often have long conversations in my head with living people, but it was really just me basically trying to sort something out in my own mind.  Come to think about it, they really weren't "conversations" as much as me, in my head, trying to explain to someone (usually my brother Reed) what I was thinking, and by ...

Evening ended well yesterday, full session, was a little nervous around 6pm and after that I might have something negative going on but it never really surfaced.  Gerra got her new car deal (getting the actual car Wednesday) with a clear signal from Irene.  Woke up this morning feeling really good, had a good full session.  Day progressed well, did one more full session, only felt slightly off at one point after a family member came over and talked.  I’m thinking I’m going to need to put in a session every time after people visit just to make sure I clear out all emotions that are not my own. My sessions are not strict or formal - it depends on if I feel like doing something in particular first or just don't feel like doing something else yet.  Often I begin with just talking with Irene. We talk about the kids, grandkids and our great granddaughter, about our plans for the future; about things we went through here; I try to imagine what her life is lik...

OMG I just had the most amazing experience!!!  I woke up feeling very good, did my morning prayer/talk with Irene/meditation and  during the meditation all of a sudden I was in this sunny, beautiful field with Irene and she was so beautiful, smiling so big, arms spread wide, I was just overwhelmed with that primordial sense of connection, love and happiness – tears were streaming down, just thinking of it now fills me with wholeness and happiness. It was only a few seconds but it was so clear and powerful.  I continued my meditation for a few minutes and then I felt Irene radiate from inside me with love and connection and happiness and joy so powerful I thought I would explode. I’ve never felt anything like it in my life. It was like an explosion of intimacy, wholeness and joy.  So amazing there are no words!!! 2 nd pray/talk/meditate session today, real good session, nothing spectacular at the time but I felt I got some good work done in raising my vibrationa...

There are things I need to do to better prepare and condition myself for "lucid living" and developing a better connection to the spiritual in my quest to manifest a "transdimensional" relationship with Irene.  This is why spiritual doctrines use mantras, diet, physical meditating poses and breathing exercises – to find and develop our connection and relationship with the spiritual world, and to habitualize that process into a lifestyle pattern.  I think a lot of it boils down to intention and manifestation; the exercises/habits promote the intention, which in turn helps manifest results into reality. I think a lot of it is also just the grace of God.  I've started to look for more information, videos, books, etc. on the afterlife, prayer, meditation, the spiritual aspects of existence - which is saying a lot, since I've always been interested in such things and have always found such information fascinating and have tried to apply it to my life.  Howev...