Love After Life

With the perspective of now over two years of developing and achieving a very fulfilling relationship with Irene, I have a better grip on what I was actually doing the whole time - and still am.  I understand it better because I have a better understanding of what is going on and how it all works - what the different levels of existence are and represent, how it all takes place in mind and - essentially - my external world is a reflection of my internal world. What I have been building is a fully developed  psychological  life with Irene, one where she and I share the same physical space psychologically - in other words, in our minds.  The only distinction between now and the way it was before she crossed over is that I have what is called "cognitive blindness" when it comes to interacting with her in my external-world experience.  Simply put, she doesn't register in my usual external physical senses, so we have been developing our connection and interaction...

For the past two weeks, Irene and I have been having a great time.  I've been able to release all worry about getting better physical clarity between us.  What we have right now is so good I'm not even concerned about it enough to "work" at it, other than by doing what we are currently doing, which is 100% satisfying, enjoyable and fun.  Talking with her during the day, making food for us and watching our shows, and doing visualizations with her, now feels like a completely normal and happy  continuation of our relationship.  I no more doubt that she is participating than I doubted it before she crossed over.  My psychology and body have totally acclimated to the new situation. Reflecting on this success, which to me is rather unbelievable, I've been able to better sort out what was the most helpful other than Irene's constant, loving help and attention, as well as any other people on the other side that may have been part of that help. Probably the mos...

Irene and I have been spending a LOT of time together focusing on my being able to see her, touch her, and hear her.  Yesterday we spent 4-5 hours total.  Last week we went three days like that and it culminated in an extremely serene, almost transcendent sensation of being together, without any trace of worries or doubt. Then family came in and other obligations and I found myself feeling a little numb and disconnected, but I went right back to it and felt totally reconnected very quickly.  I started mentally talking to Irene and envisioning her while family was here to try to maintain the connection. I've honestly been feeling like I'm going to have to tell my family to stay away unless I figure out how to keep their presence from disconnecting me from Irene.  So, I've been working some on techniques to solve that problem. What this has shown us is that it's all about attention. Yes people, myself included, use the terms "vibration" and "frequency"...

The problem of social conditioning has been percolating in my mind for a several days now.  Irene and I have been discussing it.  It's been part of our Zoom group discussions the past couple of meetings and this morning I realized the importance of a certain part of my efforts with Irene to establish an enjoyable transdimensional relationship with her. One of the main aspects of my interaction with Irene since shortly after her death was thinking about and planning our future.  When you think about it, this activity is directly in contrast with the ongoing social conditioning that the dead are "gone." Our Pinterest boards about what kind of "afterlife" we want to experience, collecting imagery and ideas about where and how we want to live, what we want to do, what we want to have in our life, has been over-writing the conditioning that "she's gone" and that "we" have "ended."  Before Pinterest, we used vision boards where you...

Please excuse the authoritarian style of writing.  When this stuff comes to me via channeling, I can either spend days trying to rephrase everything in editing or just offer the caveat: accept what resonates, ignore the rest. For most people, when they think of "imagination" they think of creating thoughts or imagery that is confined to being "in their head" - completely personal and unconnected to anything external, private thoughts that only exist in the confines of their physical brain. Thus, we have phrases like "only in your head" or "just your imagination", which trivializes imagination as something fun (or worrisome) but, for practical purposes, largely without any significant effect on the real world and on our real lives. To begin to understand the true power of imagination and its importance, we must first ask a very simple question: What is imagination? The short answer is: attention , sometimes accompanied by intention .  In...

The past couple of days I've had the most amazing realization.  It has to do with some stuff I haven't even written about here because I've been wanting to save it for the Afterlife Adventures book, but after this explosive self-realization I can't contain myself any longer. Lately I've been using my hypnagogic states when I lay down to imagine and explore activities Irene and I will be engaging in once together in the afterlife, along with what we want to experience it.  Included in this is my imagining afterlife "technologies" that would be joyful and delightful, like the "creative world experience generator" system I might have written about here before - I can't really remember. Anyway, it gives us the capacity to use a technological interface (which really appears more like a mystical interface out of a Dr. Strange movie) to, for example, change the world and sky around our home (the castle on an outcropping of rock by the ocean) to ...

As some of you know, I co-host an Automatic Writing Zoom group associated with AREI.   Often I begin automatic writing when triggered by certain questions or comments I run across (something I've always done, I just didn't realize it was "automatic writing".    A few days ago it was a question in the Soul Mate Facebook group about how to tell if something is really contact with our loved one or just in our own heads.   It triggered me to start writing. This is the third version; I refused to post the first two because of the tone and because it just too much to try and digest.   Eventually I got this version - apparently I wasn't going to be able to do my regular job until this got worked out.  It seems that with this I've put out all the information that was contained in that "download" I got a few months ago - and that's a relief.  Anyway, it's an extension of another post from a month ago. ________________________________________ ...

Today I had such a great meditation.  My ability to visualize Irene is so good these days.  Back when I was in pain I would have a hard time with long, consistent scenes of her and I together - it was like there was constant interference. Now I can easily imagine her sitting right in front of me, talking to me, smiling, laughing, etc.  I can stay in a visualized scene with her as long as I wish.  You might ask, how much of it is her, and how much my imagination?  She assures me that everything I "imagine" is in some way rooted in reality.  She has assured me of this several times with explicit confirmations expressed through amazing, synchronistic signs that I have detailed in prior entries, but that occur so fluidly and so often that I don't even think to write them down in this blog anymore. I just take them as part of our normal relationship. There is a sensation I have when I know she is guiding me to meditate and visualize, sort of a specific vibra...

It was nice today to be able to get back in my routine.  Early this morning I was enjoying a smoke on my back porch and having a discussion with Irene, a continuation of the "what is the nature of reality" conversation that we have been having and which we discussed a lot while I was down at Gerra's.  This morning I told some extra confirmation would be appreciated even though it had already been confirmed several times, especially through that television show Awake. A Jehova's Witness minister and his wife, who come by here about once a month, came by and after we sat in the living room and he spoke a while, his wife started talking about faith, and what the Biblical definition of faith was.  She read Hebrews 11:1, which says (in their version): Faith is the assured expectation of what is hoped for, the evident demonstration of realities that are not seen.   This exactly represents what I've been working on for weeks now, a perfect confirmation of how I see ...

I'm still a little off-frequency today, but doing better.  (Frequency constipated?  Get new astral-tone, the app that puts you back in focus!) I actually experienced about five minutes of sadness yesterday - I think it was more of a pity-party than anything else. You know your spirit team really, really loves it when you start throwing pity-parties.  I can just see the eyes rolling. Really? Five minutes of sadness? Good grief! How good does this guy have to have it? I kept reminding myself that to not try and figure out a solution, but rather just trust the process.  I remembered a dream again this morning, so my dream-remembering initiative is really going well.  Something I noticed about my dreams is that I don't have a lot of tactile sensation, it's mostly sight and sound. There was an interesting conversation that developed off of one of my posts about the validating process; essentially it was about where we draw the line between "what is real" and ...

During a great meditation this morning irene and I were talking about the way I always try to frame things into "conceptual frameworks" so I can understand things better intellectually.  I had been reading some comments in the afterlife groups about the difficulties in interacting with loved ones who have crossed over and also about our "multidimensional" nature. Our "multidimensional nature" has always been a thorny subject with me.  If this is some "small part" of my consciousness, it pisses me off to think that some other or "higher" aspect of my consciousness is enjoying interacting with Irene while this part of my consciousness  is stuck here using imagination, visualization and meditation to have contact with her, having occasional and minor doubts that even these experiences are "true". So we come back to what someone said in my "drifting off" state yesterday. "Why do we doubt?" Irene kept ma...

I had a good day yesterday even though I felt somewhat under the weather all day and had people over all day long.  I drank coffee out on the swing and talked to Irene instead of smoking and that was great. She and I are still developing and refining our ability to communicate and I'm trying to "tune in" to her frequency even while not meditating.  This is probably going to be a long-term effort.  Yesterday during the football game tuned in to her and sent her a mental image to let her know I was thinking of her and that I love her. Today I've been feeling even more under the weather and even had to take a nap.  I hope I don't get too sick from whatever this is. Yesterday and today I've been looking to make our interactions and my self-talk and talk with Irene more light-hearted and fun.  I asked her to take me to do some fun things in the astral when I meditated and I found us going to some sort of permanent carnival/fair with rides by the ocean, with a giant...

Yesterday afternoon and evening, for whatever reason, was a time I basically just had to distract myself from.  I don't know if it was the weather, other people's vibes, something I ate, time of year or what, but my mind was frazzled and my meditations felt superficial.  So, I just watched TV, did what work I could, then went to bed. This morning I woke up in a rather bad mood and wasn't being at all friendly to my spirit team.  I suppose I was a little frustrated, even though they reminded me that others, such as those suffering from Hurricane Harvey, have it much, much worse.  I knew I was being a bit of a self-centered pill but I really had not answer for it. Then I noticed Pico,  one of my Pekingese, sitting on the floor in front of me, just staring up at the pictures I have of Irene on her "shrine", with this lost and sad look on his face.  That just broke my heart.  I got up and got a set of pictures I had printed on a foamcore board at set i...

Yesterday's meditations were amazing in that they felt so deep and gave me such a buzzed, "leaving my body" sensation.  This morning I guess the weather pressure has changed because I don't feel brain fried - I feel great!  It's just crazy how different one day can feel from the next even though nothing has changed with regards to what I know and what my views are. This morning irene let me know that some of what I feel doesn't start with me - that she gets to missing me as well in the same way - I'm not "with her" in a tangible sense, even if she can sense me and see me better than I can see her.  Some of the time I'm feeling her missing me.  I realize that even if we were both in the physical and I could talk to her or even video chat, I'd still miss her terribly, which makes me wonder if even being able to visit her tangibly in the astral would put an end to all such feelings.  I suppose it would depend on how often I could do it a...

I've been getting a lot of new information through "irene".  I can't express here enough what that imagined time with her is doing for me now that I believe I am actually connecting to her - it's so satisfying, calming, fun, informative, and it makes me very, very happy.  The information coming in  is extremely interesting.  Yesterday she was telling me about how my "presence" there is still a very light presence, that there are a lot of things there I'm not present enough yet to sense. One thing she said was that our house - the structure, the things in it - when you're fully over there, you can feel these things when you touch them to a much more intense degree than things you touch in the physical world.  She showed me how she used to tell me how she knew what things to get, or what to put in the house or get rid of by how they "spoke" to her. She told me when she first saw this house that it "hugged" her when she walked ...

I've been thinking about thought, speech, imagery and focusing attention/intention. I was thinking about what happens when you're talking. Most "talking" is an automatic process -  you're in a conversation and things occur to you to say and you say them. But, do you construct the sentence, or the paragraph, in your mind before talking?  Have you worked out all the words you are going to say, and in what order?  Do you fully work out an idea before saying it or writing it down? The same thing goes on when I'm writing. I'm not thinking out the sentence before I write it, or the whole paragraph before I start.  I haven't even articulated the whole idea in my mind before I feel confident that I've got something "in its entirety" I'm about to express. So, what is going on? I have a sensation in my mind when I'm about to express myself, as if I've found the thought or idea or information I want to express (even without conscious...

No confirmation so far on the stuff I was talking about the other day, but I guess I didn't need it. Or maybe I was just supposed  to make my own decision on it.  I guess I had really already made my decision about it and just wanted support in making it. Anyway, the guy in the video from the other day was talking about how he opened up his ability to speak to the dead.  He was a highly skeptical person and didn't believe that talking to the dead or even spirit guides was possible, so he just pretended to be talking to them in his mind.  If you've ever had a pretend conversation with someone in your mind, you know what I'm talking about.  I would often have long conversations in my head with living people, but it was really just me basically trying to sort something out in my own mind.  Come to think about it, they really weren't "conversations" as much as me, in my head, trying to explain to someone (usually my brother Reed) what I was thinking, and by ...

Apparently we have some bad weather rolling in.  I'm several hundred miles from the Texas coast but hurricane Harvey is apparently already having a widespread effect.  It or something has affected me mentally so I'm basically taking the day off.  We said our prayers and did a couple of short meditations and my brain is so fried that I decided to just watch TV and take it easy from any heavy thinking or responsibilities other than work. One thing that struck me today while meditating, quickly.  I notice it is really easy to imagine certain parts of our "island home" in the astral, and I also noticed a couple of surprising things Irene said and did when I was imagining us together there.  Maybe more about it tomorrow, I just wanted to remind myself here.

It's been a good morning. I prayed as if Irene was sitting next to me, holding my hand and praying along with me, and it was great!  Then I had a good meditation/intention/affirmation where I easily envisioned us together.  I spent time talking to Irene and my spirit team and realized I just need to keep talking to them, even if I feel like I'm whining too much, because talking out loud about all that is going on infuses my experience with a sense of reality about them, what we're doing, what we're trying to do, and the afterlife I envision. It makes it all more real for me to talk about it out loud, infusing it in all my daily activities.  That's pretty important - to make it feel real to me.  The normal physical world is unrelenting and pervasive, so I have to do whatever it takes to keep all of this fresh and infused in my consciousness and daily life. If that means acting like a crazy old man, oh well. After reading some in the Zammit's Facebook afte...

Yesterday, I was looking at a picture of myself and Irene in a small frame on a dresser in the bedroom.  The top of my head was cut off to fit the picture in the frame but I really liked it because she has such a sweet smile in the picture.  I found myself wishing I had that picture but without it being so tightly cropped. When I came into the office I felt a longing to look through some of our pictures that I have collected of the family that I haven't yet scanned in - there's quite a pile. I reached in to a bunch that were face down, picked them up and turned them over.  There was the exact same picture at the top of 10 or 12 pictures I had picked up, except it wasn't tightly cropped - it was the full picture. That was amazing considering we have virtually no duplicates of any pictures and that was a stack of about 70 pictures.  When Irene cropped a picture to put in a small frame, it was usually the only copy we had of that picture. It wasn't until the past coup...