Love After Life

Yesterday, as part of a larger discussion going on between OOBErs Cyrus Kirkptrick, Jurgen Zeiwe and medium Susanne Wilson, I asked Jurgen about his take on how people experienced different dimensions while even seemingly in the same location. After I asked the question (in the AREI FB group), I went and spent some transdimensional time with Irene. Lately the hypnagogic experiences begin almost immediately, but I have a greater awareness in them and recall of them. Irene and I talk about them while they are occurring. A couple have included her and moments of astral sight and sound. The scenario that played out was Irene and I having fun on the beach on our tropical island, at one point jumping about 40 feet out into the ocean water (like super-jumping), seeing who could out-jump each other. She had such a smile, so happy, and laughing so much - so excited to be together, it just went all through me. The emotional reaction was just like being there. I got up and came in an...

The other day Irene took control of my iPad while I was laying in bed looking over some things of interest. She opened up iBooks (took several times with me shutting it down before I realized it was her) and kept trying to open the book "The Phase", which is about a supposedly easy technique for astral projection. She kept trying to open the book so I opened it myself, then she flipped through several pages and landed on one page that had a diagram of two overlapping two, one marked "REM Sleep" and the other "Consciousness", with the common area marked "The Phase", including lucid dreaming, astral projection, out of body experiences, etc. She enlarged the diagram to get my attention. During all this, I was holding the iPad up and away from me with my palms only touching the edge of the case. She then flipped back and forth several times on a few pages, which I took to mean that she wanted me to read those pages in particular. I did so. ...

Lately when I do my lying-down meditation, I've had more flashes of sights and sounds that seem real - meaning, it sounds as if I'm actually hearing something, and looks as if I'm actually seeing something. This is entirely different from the more dream-like state which feels more like what we normally call "dreams."  I'm conscious when they occur and I often think for a second that I have my eyes open, or that I'm hearing someone speak. Today I did several of these kinds of meditations and at one point  I had a momentary vision that I was sitting on the couch in the living room and looking down at what appeared to be a color-coded schedule of some sort in my hands.  This is similar to another such "vision" when I was in the same position, the same room, but it was a black square in my hands.  When this happens, I'm observing things from the first-person view and it is my peripheral vision that allows me to see where I am because I'm lo...

I've already written here about some of this, but the flood of synchronicities lately has me wanting to at least write some of them down. Some of it is so interwoven you really have to follow the tracks. A few weeks ago I made the decision to not do any more EVP attempts and I told Irene that if she wanted to do it let me know.  Last Friday before last there was a guy in our soul mate group who asked if he could try to use EVP to contact Irene.  He did so and she responded that she was there and we are soul mates.  Later that day she changed the channel to her favorite show and then, when I attempted to watch a recorded show, she made a different one come on (instead of the one I clicked) and that show started with a character talking to his dead wife (even though that scene had absolutely nothing to do with the rest of the show.) My blog post from May thirteenth describes an incredible synchronicity where an obscure but famous person from another country and been broug...

I'm writing Irene letters more often now. Instead of hand-writing them, which is a very painstaking process for me that usually ends up taking several days, I just type them up using the computer and then hand-write or draw on them. I'm also sending her portions of the new book with the letters. It makes the process easier and less daunting and she said it's totally fine.  I realize she knows most of the stuff I'm writing her about, but that's not the point; I just enjoy it and she enjoys getting letters from me. It helps empower the connection. We had our first Zoom meeting for Your Eternal Romantic Relationship and I thought it went really well. I felt far more comfortable in that group than I do in the automatic writing group. It will be interesting to see how it develops. There were about 6 people there, not including the hosts. The same transdimensional things have been occurring - signs from Irene, confirmations, visualizations, hypnagogic activit...

Saturday, after doing some work in the morning, I walked into the living room and a picture of the two of us (the one I used for the cover of  Love After Life), had been knocked over. I picked it up and did other things for a few minutes and came back into the room and it had been knocked over again.  That's when I realized I had totally forgotten to pour Irene a cup of coffee.  I did so and there were no more problems with the picture. Later we were out on the porch meditation and working on a game system we want in the afterlife.  I went to eat something and turn on the TV and she has once again changed the channel and her favorite show is on. It was one we had already seen a couple of times so we watched a recording of the latest Blue Bloods episode, which we both enjoy watching.  About ten minutes into the show there is a location shot of a hospital with big letters on the building - Saint Irene's.  Later in the show Danny is telling someone about hi...

I'm developing what is to me a very interesting and exciting perspective and routine concerning meditation, visualization, naps, and going to sleep at night.  It involves seeing these things as natural methods of transdimensional experience exploration, examining states of consciousness and sensations of experience via directed thought and imagery and hypnagogic states.   Today before lying down to do some transdimensional experience exploration (take a nap), I asked for some encouragement for this experimentation and got some.  (I also asked for help from anyone that could give it to me that was on my Spirit Team instead of just asking Irene, so that may be relevant going forward.) I didn't fall asleep during the 30 minutes I was lying down, but I did experience various states of consciousness and imagery. Of course, my directed imagery involved Irene, since that always produces my highest enjoyment. I had two distinct occurrences of what I call "Persistent T...

Today I had such a great meditation.  My ability to visualize Irene is so good these days.  Back when I was in pain I would have a hard time with long, consistent scenes of her and I together - it was like there was constant interference. Now I can easily imagine her sitting right in front of me, talking to me, smiling, laughing, etc.  I can stay in a visualized scene with her as long as I wish.  You might ask, how much of it is her, and how much my imagination?  She assures me that everything I "imagine" is in some way rooted in reality.  She has assured me of this several times with explicit confirmations expressed through amazing, synchronistic signs that I have detailed in prior entries, but that occur so fluidly and so often that I don't even think to write them down in this blog anymore. I just take them as part of our normal relationship. There is a sensation I have when I know she is guiding me to meditate and visualize, sort of a specific vibra...

Today started out great and then just got supercharged as the day went on.  Meditation was fantastic - it's like being in our own world, it is just so calming, the sensation of being whole and complete with my soul mate and all being so right with the world. Towards noon I was doing some chores in a very mindful fashion, being fully present and enjoying every moment when I had this weird moment of altered consciousness where I felt like Irene was sending me a message.  It felt like I was going to get a text from her or a letter, like she wasn't in the afterlife but just away for a while.  It was almost like being in a dream for a few seconds. As afternoon and another meditation came, I felt so happy and that buzzed, high feeling while meditation was almost overwhelming.  It felt like I was about to leave my body the whole time I sat.  After I finished I was thinking about that strange sensation earlier and it reminded me of when I was a kid and I could br...

There are a few things I should update my readers about. First, I'm no longer trying to capture EVPs via recordings.  It's just too much for me to try to keep up with right now and I honestly don't feel much of a connection to it.  I still do the hypnagogic experiences routines here and there, but I don't feel committed to doing it so often.  When I feel like doing it and it's a good time, I do it. I do meditate every day, usually several times a day, and yoga circulatory stretches, physical exercise and prayer are still in my daily routine.  I now spend more time on AREI activities and will be doing so in the future, as I will be hosting meetings and also helping to acclimate people to the Zoom room protocols. This is all part of the "normalization" process of our relationship.  As my confidence in our relationship has increased, I've realized that some of the things I was doing, or how often I was doing them, were habits generated by panic, fea...

Although the physical atmosphere isn't great lately (too humid), I've noticed when the air here is like that, it's almost as if the other side is calling me.  I get this lethargic buzz in my head and if I meditate or lay down to do hypnagogic experience, I'm immediately immersed in our frequency and feel high as a kite. Today I wanted to acknowledge how fortunate I am.  The fact is, a lot of people don't ever know or even meet their soul mate.  I'm one of the lucky ones - I found my soul mate, married her, and had 27 incredible years with her here.  Even though she died and I had to endure that grief, now I am so lucky to know that I have such a strong and loving person dedicated to my well-being, watching over me and doing all she can to make me happy and comfort me.  It's like having a very special, intimate guardian angel. Knowing my soul mate is with me constantly makes me very happy.  She always hears me and immersion in our "connection vibrati...

Getting back into my routine is proving harder than I thought, with a lot of visits from family and errands that have to be run popping up.  The good news is that even though I've only been able to meditate one or two times a day, it hasn't affected me negatively in any overall sense.  That's really an amazing accomplishment that needs to be recognized and appreciated because it is so easy to take "normalcy" for granted.  It wasn't that long ago I was struggling with the very idea of feeling normal and was fighting back pain and anxiety every day. Looking back at those times when I was in the grip of grief and extreme sorrow, I could not even begin to believe that my current state was something I would achieve before the end of the year, if ever.  It didn't seem possible, and I wouldn't have even been able to imagine it had I not been given those two weeks of grace after Irene crossed over.  Here I am, though, not only feeling good, connected, whole...

It was nice today to be able to get back in my routine.  Early this morning I was enjoying a smoke on my back porch and having a discussion with Irene, a continuation of the "what is the nature of reality" conversation that we have been having and which we discussed a lot while I was down at Gerra's.  This morning I told some extra confirmation would be appreciated even though it had already been confirmed several times, especially through that television show Awake. A Jehova's Witness minister and his wife, who come by here about once a month, came by and after we sat in the living room and he spoke a while, his wife started talking about faith, and what the Biblical definition of faith was.  She read Hebrews 11:1, which says (in their version): Faith is the assured expectation of what is hoped for, the evident demonstration of realities that are not seen.   This exactly represents what I've been working on for weeks now, a perfect confirmation of how I see ...

The past several days I've been helping  Gerra out in Austin after she gave birth to my new granddaughter, Kyra Irene and I just got back yesterday.  I'm still working my way back into my normal routine. What I've found so heartening, though, was my capacity to emotionally and psychologically weather a six-day upheaval of my routine, including sleep and meditation patterns.  Arriving back home was a very welcome event, but I never came close to having a serious emotional downswing.  Even the physical part wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be, with all the driving around, lack of sleep, and the physical exertions that were out of my ordinary pattern. In fact, I enjoyed myself immensely, and never felt as though I was losing contact with Irene or losing my way as far as our goals and direction.  I felt very confident that everything was fine and that things were going as they should.  Gerra has nice back yard spot to spend quiet time and I used that...

Sunday I got to meet several people associated with AREI and in that Facebook group in an international video conference.  What a surreal experience. I'm still trying to re-orient myself after that and another busy weekend with the family.  I'm going to be learning how to be a facilitator for such groups in the future.  Right now they are regularly scheduled for early Sunday mornings my time.  It's really interesting to have conversations with completely sincere people about things like mediumship, the afterlife, NDEs and OOBEs ... it normalizes a whole set of concepts and experiences in a way that's difficult to achieve without that kind of group-based psychological and emotional support. This morning I had a dream of Irene. It was only a few moments, but I did get to hear her voice and see her pretty clearly.  She looked to be 35-40.  I was so happy when I woke up!  It seems that adding the HE practice to my daily process, and establishing that fir...

I had a full day's worth of stuff to do today. Took the dogs to the groomer and went into town to run some errands, plus I had plenty of regular work to do. Still, I kept on track with my goal and my meditations were fantastic. When I felt that fatigued buzz in the afternoon, I lay down and recorded one HE (hypnagogic experience) after another. It was crazy - I couldn't even keep up. I missed a couple but got quite a few, one with Irene that made me very happy. It seemed like about 15 minutes had passed and it never felt like I had fallen asleep, but when I got up it was an hour later and I was completely refreshed. Here's a copy-paste from a couple of days of my HE log: HYPNAGOGIC EXPERIENCES 10-19-2017 #1: Somebody was cleaning something on the floor, which I thought was the recording device I was using. #2: Girl dressed in a black and grey costume, like batgirl, got on a motorcycle. #3: Me, the Girl from #2, and someone else are going somewhere. I look like...

My second meditation yesterday was focused on simply allowing, accepting and receiving whatever information - or no information - came my way during that time.  I try to keep my mind relatively clear and not intend or deliberately imagine.  At one point an HE (hypnagogic experience) played out where Irene and I were laying on what was like a clear ground of glass and looking down at me as I did something in an office somewhere - it looked like I was in a police station of some sort looking for someone who worked there. As the day went on I felt very confident and realized that I had made the decision to become even more fully committed to our adventure - the adventure of me trying to have a more complete experience with her.  Not because I needed it due to sorrow or grief, but rather because I have discovered it is my "calling" - I find joy, excitement and enthusiasm in this pursuit. It makes me both want to get out of bed in the morning and go to bed at night. While ...

Another really busy family day Sunday so I didn't have the time or energy to blog yesterday, but it was a good day. The key word and idea the past couple of days has been "allowing".  Even when things are going well, I still overthink and try to come up with solutions to problems that don't even exist.  For example, sometimes when I wake up I feel completely ambivalent about praying and meditating, and I immediately characterize it as a problem I need to solve. I consider it a "problem" because I'm worried that feeling ambivalent is the beginning of a trend, that I'm going to lose my connection to Irene and the desire to blog or write anything about this journey or my experiences or thoughts..  It never happens - the ambivalence I feel some days always passes whether I obsess about it or not, but my mind refuses to just let it go. Of course, when I think about how things could be, such as being wracked with grief or having serious health issue...

Yesterday's EVP recording had a weird anomaly on it - it sounded like it could be a voice, but I couldn't make it out.  That's one of those things I'm not going to read too much into - if I can get a clear voice, great, but I'm not going to strain to make anything out.  I'll let those on the other side figure out how to get a more clear voice onto the recordings if they wish.  I'm going to continue recording. It was very hot again yesterday; even though I slept late I got sleep in the late afternoon and decided to lay down and try a "drifting off" astral projection attempt.  It actually went very well as I remained aware during several "dream" sequences. At one point I found myself looking into the black screen of my iPad and seeing my reflection - I looked like I was about 25.  I was aware at the time and asked myself if I was astral projecting because it seemed pretty real, but I quickly left that state. I find it relatively easy ...